Irresistible Love

Zachary's POV:

I love you.

I jerked up from my sleep and sat on the couch, rubbing my face with my hands. Beads of sweat formed on my forehead as I shuddered in place. Her voice, still fresh in my mind, won't allow me to sleep. Three months, eight days, and five hours have passed since she disappeared. She betrayed me. All those promises were just lies. Just plain lies. She promised me that she would always be there for me. Forever. And yet, she broke her promise and left me forever and ever. I inhaled deeply as I got up from my office couch and walked to the glass window.

The clock read half-past five in the morning. I looked back at my desk to find it all messy, a stack of important papers spilling from their files. A sigh escaped my mouth as I shoved my hands into my pants pockets and stared at the trees, which were black against the sky. It was dawn. The sun was about to rise, the birds already flying in search of their food. Traffic was sparse, and only a few people, who seemed to be jogging, were visible below my office building.

I had been working late into the night, wanting to finish all of my work, which had been neglected for three months.

As I turned around to go back to my desk, the world tilted before my eyes and I stumbled over my own two feet, feeling dizzy. All of a sudden, my head started aching, as if somebody was hammering on it. All of this was happening to me because of my lack of sleep. How would I sleep? How could I sleep when she betrayed me? Even though she betrayed me, she kept lingering in my mind, where I saw her every single time I closed my eyes. She appeared before me when I was sleeping, when I was thinking, when I was wandering here and there, when I was eating—just everywhere. She was with me even though she wasn't near me.

I still remembered when the cops pulled her body from the sunken car. I felt like killing myself. Why did I let her go?

It was all my fault.

She broke my heart, my soul, into pieces. My hands trembled when the cops told me to remove the shroud from her face. Her face had been ruined in the accident. I couldn't even work up the courage to look at her when the stupid cops declared her dead. Her father was screaming and fighting with the cops, yelling that his daughter couldn't leave him. Her mother was on the ground, senseless with grief, while the medical team assisted her. Her friend Kiara and her brother Jace were crying their eyes out. But me? I just stood there, my back to her body. She was wearing my shirt and my pants. It was undoubtedly her. But still, my heart screamed that it wasn't her, that I was the one who had died. It's not possible; she can't be...

Four people died that day. The driver of the truck that hit my Juliette's car, the taxi driver, a lady in a black car, and my Juli...

I still couldn't believe that she had left me. I thought that we were finally together, that we were finally going to start our new life together, but then this had to happen. I refused to believe that the body they found was Juliette's. Even though it was wearing my clothes, which she was wearing when she left me. Even though her hair, her height, everything matched Juliette's physique. Still, I refused to believe it was Juliette. But the way the others behaved after seeing that body convinced me.

But I didn't have the courage to face her death. I shut myself down, closed myself off from the world, and when the pain didn't fade away, I started drinking alcohol to the point that I would stumble and pass out. It was only because of Max, Kristian, and Willie that I was standing here once again, a mask on my face to hide every emotion and feeling away from the world. She had been the only one capable of breaking down my walls, and now, without her, all my happiness and joy were just gone.

"Why did you leave me?" I mumbled as I crouched down on the floor, holding my throbbing head. Earlier, I had taken sleeping pills to try to get some much-needed rest, but even those meds didn't work. She invaded my dreams, forcing me to wake up. But the pills still seemed to be affecting me. I felt dizzy and nauseous all of a sudden. Crawling back to the couch, I grabbed hold of a water bottle on the coffee table and splashed some water on my face.

Nothing is working...

Inhaling deeply and exhaling out, I leaned against the couch and closed my eyes for a few minutes. I didn't even notice when I fell asleep in my sitting position.

Excuse me?

Sir?

A sigh left my mouth when I felt something cold against my cheek.

Sir?

Is someone calling me?

But who?

Despite my desperate need to sleep, I tried to open my eyes, and when I did, I saw two black orbs looking down at me worriedly. A woman with raven black hair and a pale complexion gazed down at me, her hand on my cheek as she patted it softly, trying to wake me up.

"Are you alright? Should I call the doctor?" she asked. I furrowed my eyebrows when I realized her hand was still on my cheek. I grabbed her hand and removed it. As I shifted my position, trying to get up, my feet wobbled and I stumbled, but a pair of hands supported me, grabbing my arm and preventing me from landing on the floor. The same woman held my arm protectively, trying to help me stand, but my anger surged at being touched by another woman who was not my Juliette. I jerked myself out of her grasp and glared at her.

"I am fine," I gritted out, and she smiled, surrendering with her hands in the air.

"Why were you sleeping there? I mean, are you alrig—" I cut her off before she could finish.

"Who are you and what are you doing here?" I asked as I took in her appearance.

She was wearing a purple blouse with a cream-colored pencil skirt and beige heels. Her dress was professional, and I saw new files on the desk, which I assumed were hers.

"Oh, I'm Cristina Dimir. I'm your personal assistant," she said, and I raised an eyebrow at her.

"I mean, I was Mr. Kristian's assistant, but now that you're back, I was reassigned by Ms. Cosmina to be your new PA," she said, which made me look down at my feet.

Indeed, Kristian had been invaluable in my absence. He took care of my as well as all his business when I was lost trying to find myself.

"Then where were you these past ten days?" I asked. I didn't remember seeing her around the office in the ten days since I had returned.

"Oh, I was on vacation," she said, smiling at me and showing me her dimples, which just reminded me of Juliette. My eyes remained fixated on her dimples until she cleared her throat, which brought me out of my state.

"Get me a cup of black coffee and Mr. Pachia's file," I said as I stood up, but the sudden change in elevation made me dizzy once again, and I held my head, groaning.

"Sir, are you al—" before she could reach out and touch me, I held up a finger, stopping her in her tracks.

"Do what I have asked you to do," I ordered in a strict commanding tone.

She blinked several times before she nodded, bobbing her head up and down as she turned around. She picked up her files as she walked out of the room, but not before glancing my way.

I sighed as I picked my suit jacket up off the couch and put it on, buttoning it up as I walked to the desk and looked at the clock. It was a quarter past nine in the morning. Judging by the time, I concluded that my employees must have already arrived at the office. I, too, should get back to work before Juliette invades my blank mind. Raking a hand through my hair, I tried to concentrate on my work, but I failed miserably. I couldn't forget Juliette just because I didn't want to remember her.

She was my life, my soul, my everything. I could still feel her presence beside me. She was as essential to me as breath.

I took my phone out and opened the gallery, clicking on her picture. A picture that I had taken out of the blue when our whole family was out for a picnic. I remembered joking with her that I was taking the picture because she told me to cherish happy memories with the family, but really, being with her was the thing that made me happiest. I pulled her to me and snapped a photo of her and me. She was looking at me while I looked at the camera. If I had known then that this picture would be the only picture I had of us together, I would never...

"Your coffee, sir," my train of thought was interrupted by none other than Ms. Dimir. She set the cup of coffee down on my desk and placed Mr. Pachia's file before me, all with a smile plastered on her face, which irked me.

How can she be so happy?

Am I the only one whose happiness has been stolen?

"Do you need anything else, sir?" she asked and I shook my head no. She nodded and turned around to leave but stopped when I called out for her, "Ms. Dimir." 

She turned around, smiling at me. "Yes, sir?" she asked as she clutched a file close to her chest. 

"Next time, don't forget to knock!" I said nonchalantly, pointing my finger towards the door.

She looked at the door and then at me. Her smile faded away as she nodded once again absentmindedly before walking out of my room.

"Everyone seems so happy, Juliette." I looked back at Juliette's picture on my phone as I talked to her.

"Everyone except me," I finished. My eyes stung as tears streaked down my cheeks uncontrollably. I kissed her picture before putting the phone aside. I wiped my face with my handkerchief, lifted up the hot cup of coffee to drink, but I couldn't to a single sip. My appetite was long lost. Nothing seemed to extinguish the fire in my burning soul, nor did anything soothe the pain of being left alone to deal with the world without Juliette.

"My only wish is for you to come back to me, my Juliette." Tears continued streaming down my face as I thought about her, again and again, cursing myself for letting her go alone that day.

Zachary's POV:

"Where are the weapons?" I asked as calmly as I could.

"I-I don't know." He trembled before me on the floor. Kneeling, he joined his palms and begged me for his life.

"Pitiful," I spat and brought the butt of my gun down on his face. He fell to his side, but before I could kick him, Willi ran in between us, stopping me.

"Let me handle this," he said, and I glared at him. Huffing, I turned around and rubbed my face, aggravated by this whole situation. The illegal arms that were supposed to be delivered to my dealer today vanished in the middle of the road, and the only person we could get our hands on was the driver. According to him, some thugs stopped the truck and took the weapons, throwing the driver to the road. But I didn't really care about the driver, just my guns. I needed to get them to my dealer. How dare those thugs?!

"He just keeps on repeating that story about the thugs," added Willi's tired voice.

"Finish him," I stated, not even looking at the driver.

"What?" he asked in shock. The driver whimpered, bursting into tears as soon as he heard.

"Kill him," I said, my eyes devoid of any emotion.

"We can't do that. He's the only one who can tell us where the weapons are," Willi said. But I just took my phone out of my pants pockets when it vibrated.

As I read the text message from my informant, an irritated and annoyed expression marred my face. I turned around, ready to kill that damn bastard of a driver.

"Well, I can tell you where the weapons are," I let out a sarcastic laugh. The next moment a gunshot echoed through the room. I had shot the driver's leg, and now I was pointing my gun at his face, staring him down with the intention to kill him then and there.

"What are you doing?" Willi yelled, trying to get in my way to stop me from killing the driver. I showed him the text message, and as realization struck him, he looked back at the driver, who was yelling and sobbing because of his wounded leg.

"You bastard! You surrendered the truck to the damn cops?" Willi snapped at him, and he was the one who now kicked him in the stomach.

"Crazy bastard," I muttered as I watched the driver get hit. I kept on watching until he was on the verge of death.

"Stop," I said, and Willi looked back at me.

"But he—" he halted mid-sentence when he noticed my murderous expression.

"Who told you to betray us?" I asked the driver as calmly as I could, who continued to writhe in pain on the ground.

"I will never tell you," he laughed and spat blood on the ground.

"We will see about that," I said and turned around to Max.

"Bring the taser. Use it on him until he tells the truth. Don't let him sleep or die. Make him suffer," I looked back at the driver, who was breathing heavily.

"Now!" I said and walked out of the room.

His screams of agony could be heard even as I exited the warehouse. They did their jobs perfectly, making him suffer.

"Call Jeremiah and inform him of the situation."

Willi nodded and fished his phone out of his pants pockets in order to call our inside man, who was working as a cop. I walked to my car and got in, igniting the engine and driving off to my office building. It has been three or four days since I was last in the office. I've been busy dealing with illegal matters lately, and because of that, I was not able to work on my legal business.

"Good afternoon, sir," Cosmina greeted as I walked past her desk.

"Send every important file that you need signed to my office. I intend to finish all my pending tasks today," I said, coming to a stop in front of Cosmina. As I was talking, I heard a loud gasp and turned to find a woman starring at my hand with wide eyes.

"Sir, you have blood on your hand. And also on your sleeves! Are you hurt?" The woman tried to touch my hand, but I jerked away before she could touch me and glared at her.

"Mind your own business, Ms. Dimir," I said nonchalantly and looked back at Cosmina.

"But, si—"

"Send me the files, Cosmina," I said and turned around to leave.

As soon as I got inside my office, the first thing I did was walk to the small shelf where I kept my extra shirts. Grabbing one, I went to the bathroom to wash off the blood and change my shirt. Everything in my life was so messed up. I watched the water turned red as it washed the bloodstains from my hands down the sink. The water running over my hands held my attention until I looked at myself in the mirror.

Nothing.

There was nothing on my face. I was expressionless. Tired. And most importantly, I didn't look a bit like Zachary Udolf Sullivan. But this was reality. The man standing right before me in the mirror was indeed me. A loser who lost everything.

"You don't deserve happiness," I mumbled, staring at my reflection before splashing a handful of water on my face.

Life had to go on, and I had to continue living. I couldn't just break down like this. I bet Juliette wouldn't have liked seeing me like this, but I just couldn't help it. Every time I tried to even think about moving on with my life, I just froze up. I thought I would live the rest of my life with her. It wasn't her fault that I was in this position, nor did I blame anyone. But every time I looked at myself, all I could think about was how my life would've been if she were still here. I knew she didn't hate me like she did when I kidnapped her for the first time. I knew that her hatred had transformed into love and that she loved me deeply. But then why? Why? Just why did it have to be like this?

I was the one who killed people, who did so many terrible things. So why was she the one to lose her life? I should have been the one. Why was she punished for my sins? We both were punished. I lost the only person I ever loved in my life. She lost her life. 

But she was in love with a sinner. To hell with God's forgiveness. He forgives repentant sinners while punishing the ones closest to them. And, in my case, the only person next to me was my Juliette.

"Here are the files you asked for." Ms. Dimir placed the files before me on my desk. I looked up at her, peering over my reading glasses, and narrowed my eyes. 

"I thought I had asked Cosmina to bring me these files."

"She was held up by the managing director, so she asked me to hand you the files," she said and gave me a smile.

"Kristian is in the office today?" I mumbled to myself, but she heard and replied with a quiet 'yes.'

"Ask him to see me. You may leave," I told her without even looking at her, too busy reading the files, but I could still feel her presence.

"What is it?" I asked as I looked back at her. She looked startled all of a sudden, but then she stood straight and her eyes darted to my hand.

"H-how is your wound? You had blood all over your sleeves before. Should I bring you firs—"

"Ms. Dimir," I interrupted her and she looked at me, "mind your own business, yah?" I gave her a stern look and glanced pointedly at the door. She inhaled deeply and nodded before turning on her heel. She looked back my way once before walking out of my office and closing the door behind her.

"How annoying," I muttered and skimmed through the files.

"Every time I see you, the older you look," Kristian declared as he barged into my office without knocking.

"When will you learn to knock?" I asked as I continued typing on my laptop.

"And when will you take care of yourself?" he asked, which made me look up at him.

"Look at your knuckles," he said. I ignored him, not bothering to look at my knuckles because I already knew that they were scraped up from all the punching.

"It's not anything new," I muttered in reply.

"Of course it's not new, but it's also becoming a habit. You no longer seem to take care of yourself. Get a grip on yourself, or your business will suffer," he said, and that made me look up at him. I narrowed my eyes at him and watched as he smirked back at me, sitting down on the corner of my desk.

"Get off my desk." I had to glare at him to get across my point because he was not one to take me seriously.

"Oh boy! You and your mood." He shrugged before getting off my desk and walking around to sit on the chair, where he threw his head backward with a sigh.

"I heard what happened. Weapons were seized by the police, huh?" He slouched in the chair comfortably, plucking a paperweight from the desk and rolling it between his hands he spoke. "Now they'll investigate, and it'll only be a matter of time before they find you." Biting his lower lip, he looked towards the glass window as he placed the paperweight back on the desk.

"Want me to take the lead in this matter?" he asked out of nowhere.

"You?" I scoffed at the thought and closed the laptop.

"Yes, me!" He rubbed his eyes with the palm of his hands before getting up from the chair.

"I've assigned this to Willi. He can take care of thi—"

"You've been too naive lately!" He slammed his hands on my desk. "You trust that guy blindly. Yet isn't he the one who killed my cousin and your sister?" he asked, raising an eyebrow. I clasped my hands, placing my elbow on the desk. 

"He has earned my trust; I am not blind when it comes to him. I do have my eyes on him."

He looked at me for a few seconds before laughing out loud. "Hmmm, interesting. Indeed, very interesting," he replied, "Well then, I'll be off now. I have work to do. Give me a call if you need me. I'm off to Melbourne now." A ghost of a smile played on his lips as he adjusted his tie.

"Melbourne? Why Melbourne?" I asked, wondering what type of work he had in Melbourne when all his business was here in Romania.

"Huh?" He looked up at me with raised eyebrows before speaking, "Oh, it's nothing. Just, unlike you, I have a woman whom I cherish and who is alive," he air quoted the word 'alive.' I jerked to my feet, seething with anger at his disrespectfulness.

"Kristian, you need to learn to hold your tongue," I said as calmly as I could, not wanting to hurt my brother.

"That," he bent in my direction mockingly with his hands shoved into his pants pockets, "is my bad, brother." He smirked and, with tentative steps, walked out of my room, leaving me burning with rage.

"Idiots! I'm surrounded by idiots," I muttered to myself as I raked a hand through my hair.