The Pretend Luna

My heart races with excitement as I make my way through the woods. The sun is shining and the grass feels crisp under my feet as I hurry towards our home.

I have just left the pack healer’s house, and I can barely contain my joy. I am pregnant. Ezra and I are going to have a pup. Walking back to our den, I have a smile on my face, eager to share the news with my mate.

As I approach the den, I hear a sound that makes my blood run cold. My mind races with a million different possibilities, but I can hardly believe what I’m hearing.

The air is thick with the scent of arousal the closer I get to our den, and the sound I’m hearing is one of passion, of sex.

And it’s coming from my den.

I freeze in my tracks, my heart now racing uncomfortably fast. I know what this means. Ezra is cheating on me. My mate, the Alpha of our pack, is betraying me with another female.

I take a deep, calming breath, trying to compose myself, because I know I can’t lose it now. Not when I need to confront him. I close my eyes and inhale deeply, gathering all the strength and courage I need to confront him with this betrayal.

I push the door open, and the sight I see makes my heart drop to the pit of my stomach as I stand motionless, watching in horror as my mate blatantly betrays me with my biggest rival.

It’s like a punch to the gut and I feel physically ill. I want to scream, rage, and lash out at them both, but I’m frozen in place, my body numb with shock.

They break apart, breathless and flushed, and Lucia looks at me, her brown eyes wide in surprise.

Ezra looks neither guilty nor remorseful, as he runs a hand through his sweaty dark hair. He looks almost content, as if this isn’t the first time this has happened, which only makes my anger flare and my claws extend involuntarily.

My voice comes out a little more than a growl. “What the hell is going on here?”

Ezra stands up naked, his jaw clenching tightly as he looks at me condescendingly. “Katina, what are you doing here?”

“What am I doing here? What the hell are you doing here? With her?” I growl, pointing at Lucia whose lips have tilted up into a smirk as she wraps the covers around her naked body.

“It’s not what it looks like,” Ezra says, trying to placate me. But I’m not having any of it.

“I know what it looks like. It looks like you’re cheating on me!” I shout, my voice echoing through the den.

Ezra sighs, running a hand across his face, and for the first time, I see a hint of guilt on his face. “I’m sorry, Katina. I didn’t mean to hurt you.”

“I don’t want to hear your pathetic apologies. You betrayed me, Ezra. You broke our bond, and you broke my heart.” I say, as tears start to prick at the corners of my eyes.

“I know. But please, hear me out,” Ezra pleads, trying to reach for me but I just shake my head, and move away.

“No. I can’t deal with this right now.” I say, and I spin around and make my way out of the den.

I feel broken, like a part of me has been shattered into a million pieces. The man I loved, the man I trusted with my life has betrayed me. And not just with anyone, but with the female who considers me her biggest rival in the pack.

As I make my way out of the den, I see the other wolves in our pack watching me, their expressions filled with concern. I ignore them, determined to get as far away from Ezra and Lucia as possible.

I have no idea where I’m going, but I know I can’t stay here. Not when my mate has betrayed me so completely.

With each step I take away from them, I feel a little stronger, a little more in control of my emotions.

I have always been a strong-minded warrior, and I won't let this defeat me.

I won't let Ezra's betrayal define me. I am more than just his mate. I am the Luna of our pack, and I will not let Ezra and Lucia’s betrayal tear me down.

As I wander aimlessly through the woods, I take deep breaths, trying to calm myself down. I need to be clear-headed and rational if I want to make a decision about what to do next.

Eventually, my wandering brings me to a clearing near the river. It's a place I've always loved, a place where I go to meditate and gather my thoughts.

I sit down on a rock and take a deep breath, letting the tranquility of the place calm me down. I close my eyes and breathe deeply, trying to clear my mind of all thoughts of Ezra and Lucia.

But even in this peaceful place, they haunt me. I try to push them out of my mind, to focus on the joy of my pregnancy.

I am going to have a pup, and that is something to be excited about. But even that thought is clouded by the knowledge that my pup will be born into a world where my mate doesn't love me. A world where I have been betrayed by the one person I trusted above all others.

He didn’t come after me.

The thought plagues my mind, as I open my eyes, and stare at my reflection in the flowing water, wondering why I’m not enough for him.

Clear blue eyes framed with thick long lashes stare back at me, a delicate nose and plump full lips that perfectly complement my heart shaped face. Time and again, I have been complimented for my beauty in our pack, and others. But today, I don’t feel beautiful, or strong, or anything that I am known for.

I feel broken, and I hate it.

I feel the tears welling up inside me again as I stare at myself, wishing I could take back the last few minutes of my life. I take a deep breath, trying to hold them back, but it's no use.

The tears start to flow, and I let them. I let them flow freely, letting out all the pain and hurt that I've been holding back.

I wake up with a start, my heart pounding violently.

Sweat drips down my forehead–despite the chilly air–as I look around the unfamiliar room I find myself in. It takes me a minute to remember where I am, and why I didn’t sleep at my den.

My whole body feels numb, but at the same time, my heart aches with a pain that feels all too real, as yesterday’s events replay in my head like a broken record, reminding me once again of the betrayal I have faced.

I can still see his face twisted in pleasure as he lay with my biggest rival in the pack, and the sounds of pleasure he emitted as he thrusts into her, cheating on me right in the den we share as mates.

The pain is too much to bear, and I feel tears prickling at the corners of my eyes. I take a deep breath, trying to calm myself down, but it doesn’t work. The more I try to push the thoughts away, the more they inundate me.

An image of Lucia, twirling her hair while flirting with him comes to my mind, and it makes my heart ache even more. Lucia has always wanted Ezra, and it seems like her plans to one-up me has come to fruition.

I sit up, rubbing my hands over my face, hoping that it was all a nightmare, but the dull ache in my chest tells me otherwise.

The pack healer was kind enough to help me with a sleeping potion. But even in a potion-induced sleep, I was still haunted by Ezra’s betrayal.

I feel as if my heart is being ripped apart by the hands of betrayal. I still can’t believe that this is happening to me, not after everything we’ve been through together.

I’ve known that Ezra is a selfish Alpha, but he is the person I’ve always been able to count on, the one who has always been there for me through thick and thin. Now, I don’t know what to think anymore.

All the memories we’ve shared, the promises we’ve made to each other, it all feels so worthless and insignificant in the face of his betrayal.

I’m pulled out of my thoughts, when I hear footsteps approaching the room, and I turn to see who it is.

Jenna–the pack healer–walks in carrying a tray of fruits, and a worried expression on her face as she approaches me.

“Katina, are you okay?” she asks softly.

I try to speak, but I can’t find the words. My voice is caught in my throat, and I end up shaking my head in response to her question.

She nods sympathetically, before taking a seat next to me on the bed. She drops the tray on a nearby bench, and places a gentle hand on my arm, trying to comfort me.

“I know it hurts, Katina. But you’re a strong woman. You’ll get through this,” she says, her voice soft.

I try to smile through my tears, but it’s a futile attempt. The healer pulls me into a tight embrace, and I sob into her shoulder. It’s comforting to feel her arms around me, to know that someone cares.

After a few minutes, I pull away from her, still feeling raw and exposed. She hands me a tissue, and I wipe away my tears, trying to regain my composure.

“Thank you,” I whisper hoarsely.

She nods, before getting up and leaving the room, giving me some space to collect myself. As I sit alone in the quiet room, I take a deep breath, trying to calm myself down. I close my eyes and lean back against the headboard, feeling exhausted and emotionally spent.

I have no idea what to do next. If I expose Ezra, it will destabilize the pack’s leadership system. But I can’t go on living as the Luna, with a mate who is cheating on me. There’s no integrity, having an Alpha who has betrayed the mating bond.

I know that I have a tough road ahead of me. But for now, all I can do is take it one step at a time, and hope that one day, the pain will subside, and I’ll be able to pick up the pieces of my heart and move on.

I don’t want to see Ezra, but I know that I can’t hide out in the pack healer’s house forever. I take a nibble of the fruits she has left for me, before I steel myself for what’s to come ahead.

I walk out of Jenna's house and take a deep breath of the fresh air; It’s crisp and clean, but there’s a chill in the air that I can’t ignore.

I look up and see the first snowflakes of the season drifting down from the sky. It’s beautiful, but it’s also a sign of what’s to come. Winter is coming, and with it comes the harsh reality that life is about to get even tougher than it already is.

I adjust my fur coat and start making my way back to the den that I share with my traitorous mate.

But as I get closer, I notice a group of wolves waiting outside. My heart sinks as I recognize them to be the members of the council. Despite being the pack’s Luna, these council members hold more sway over decisions for the pack, than I do.

As I approach, they all give me cold stares—the kind that tell me they have no sympathy for me. I don’t know what to expect, but I know it’s not good. Slowly, they step aside, making a path for me to enter the den. I walk in to find Ezra, sitting on his throne, his face expressionless as our gazes meet, and I know right away that something is wrong.

“What’s going on?” I ask, my voice shaking slightly.

Ezra doesn’t say anything. Instead, he gestures to the council members, who step forward as one.

“Katina,” the head of the council says, calling me by name instead of by title.

My stomach twists because I know whatever he has to say will not be in my favor.

“There has been an accusation against you, and we have evidence to support that you have been unfaithful to your mate.”

I feel my whole world fall apart. I can’t believe that Ezra will stop so low, or that anyone will think that I’ll ever be unfaithful to Ezra. But the way the council members are looking at me, I know they believe it.

I don’t beg or show any weakness. Instead, I stand tall and hold my head high. “I don’t believe you,” I whisper, shaking my head, in denial.

“I want a trial,” I add firmly, staring squarely at my supposed mate, feeling nothing but disgust at his high-handed way of dealing with his infidelity.

But the council shakes their heads in unison. “Sorry, Katina. The evidence is clear. You are no longer fit to be the pack’s Luna. Your title is stripped, and you are excommunicated from this pack.”

I’m stunned. I feel like I’ve been hit with a sledgehammer, but I don’t dare to show it. Instead, I nod slowly, accepting my fate with as much dignity as I can muster.

“I understand,” I say in a low voice.

Then, without another word, I turn around and walk away. I don’t look back, even though my heart is heavy with a sense of loss.

I’ve just suffered maybe the greatest lost in the history of wolf-kind; I’ve lost my title, my pack, and my mate all in one breath.

But as I walk through the snow, I feel a different kind of loss too. I’m pregnant–and I haven’t told Ezra. It’s not because I’m afraid of his reaction or because I want to keep it from him. It’s because he doesn’t deserve to know. He’s hurt me and broken my trust, and he doesn’t deserve to have anything to do with our child.

So I keep walking, knowing that I have no choice but to start a new life somewhere else. I have to build a new pack, one where I can be the leader and where my child will be safe.

I don’t know how I’m going to do it, but I know I have to. For the sake of my child, and for the sake of myself, I have to be strong.

As I walk, I feel the snowflakes landing on my fur coat. I stop for a moment and look up at the sky. It’s beautiful, but it’s also treacherous. It’s a reminder that life can be harsh and unforgiving, but it’s also a sign of hope.

The snow will melt eventually, and spring will come. Life will go on, and I have to go on with it. I take a deep breath, steeling myself for what’s to come, and keep walking into an uncertain future.